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Basic InformationMore InformationLatest NewsHow to Make Your Child's Hospital Stay Safer, Less StressfulObesity May Boost Odds for MS in KidsHealth Tip: Diarrhea in KidsOpioid Epidemic Doubled Number of U.S. Kids Sent to Foster CareSwimming Lessons a Must for EveryoneHow to Help When Your Child Weighs Too MuchHave Kids, Buy More Produce?Zika's Damage Continues in Children Infected Before BirthCDC Warns of Start to 'Season' for Mysterious Paralyzing Illness in KidsParent Who Listens Can Help Kids Thrive Despite TraumaHealth Tip: Ear Piercing For KidsReacting Against a 'Too Clean' World, Some Parents Go Too Far the Other WaySurvey Urges Grandparents to Lock Down Their Meds When Kids VisitCalifornia Took on Anti-Vaxxers, and WonHow Does Sunshine During Pregnancy Affect Learning?Surgery Helps Babies Missing a Heart Chamber Survive, But Problems LingerAbuse, Injury More Likely When Child is With Male Caregiver: StudyHow to Foster Your Child's ImaginationLow Vitamin D at Birth Linked to Kids' High Blood Pressure RiskHow Do Kids Learn To Turn Off Troublesome Tics?Meet 'Huggable,' the Robot Bear Who's Helping Hospitalized KidsWill Video Games Make Your Kid Obese? Maybe NotChildhood Brain Tumor Survivors Face More StrugglesFDA Expands Cystic Fibrosis Treatment Approval to Children Ages 6 to 12New Drug Combats Leading Cause of DwarfismHow Do Birth Defects Affect Childhood Cancer Risk?FDA Approves Victoza Injection for Children 10 Years and OlderHealth Tip: Preparing Your Child For Sleepaway CampTips for Keeping Your Child Healthy at CampA Simple Way to Help Prevent Child ObesityType 1 Diabetes Might Affect Young Kids' Brain DevelopmentHow to Put Limits on Your Family's Screen TimeChickenpox Vaccine Shields Kids From Shingles, TooWhooping Cough Vaccine Effectiveness Fades With Time: StudyHundreds of Young Kids Drown in Pools Each Year -- Keep Yours SafeWhich Dogs Are More Likely to Bite Your Kids?Health Tip: Preventing Swimmer's EarAHA News: With Summer Vacation Here, How Much Screen Time Is Too Much?Health Tip: Prevent BullyingHealth Tip: Avoid Mouth Injuries in ChildrenKids Still Being Poisoned by Detergent PodsViolent Video Games, Unlocked Guns a Dangerous Combo for KidsWhy Some Kids With Eczema Are at Higher Allergy Risk'Controlled Burns' Better for Kids' Health Than Wildfires: StudyHow Kids Benefit From Doing ChoresAHA News: Report Seeks Answers About Mysterious, Dangerous Heart Disease in KidsKids of Opioid-Using Parents May Be More Likely to Attempt SuicideCholesterol Levels Improving Among U.S. KidsEarlier Bedtimes Help Kids Fight Obesity1 in 5 Kids Don't Strap on Helmets Before Biking Questions and AnswersLinks |
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Perfectionistic SonMy son has always been somewhat of a perfectionist. He always wants to play his best at sports and cries when he has a bad game. He has always had good grades and I have always told him that if he tries his best, that is the most important thing. The problem is that every time there is a big test in school (he is in the 7th grade), he studies, asks me to quiz him and if he gets an answer wrong he starts crying, he wakes up the next morning and goes straight for the text book and begins to cry as he studies again. He asks me to quiz him and again, if he misses something, he is in tears and says he doesn't know it and he is scared he's going to fail. He has always gotten mostly A's and some B's. I try to tell him that I understand that this test is important to him and I understand his fear that if he doesn't know it he could fail a test. I also try to ask him the question What's the worst that could happen? That he fails the test. Did he try his best? Did he feel satisfied with the amount of studying he did? Can he see himself with an F and still work hard in class and do better on the next test? I don't know what else to do? I explain to him that if he continues worrying so much that it puts him in tears every time he studies for test, gets quizzed for the test, he will make himself physically ill. I have had an ulcer and he knows what that was like and how painful. I tried to explain how important it is for him to stop, take a break, take a deep breath, go to sleep on time, study in the morning when he's had time away from the book. I need to know what else I can do because I don't want to increase his stress level, his fear and I can't handle seeing him cry every time there is a test. Help THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION WILL NOT BE DISPLAYED UNTIL YOU HAVE INDICATED YOUR AGREEMENT WITH THE DISCLAIMER PRINTED JUST BELOW. CLICK THE 'I AGREE' BUTTON TO AGREE TO THESE TERMS AND SEE THE RESPONSE.
- Dr. Dombeck responds to questions about psychotherapy and mental health problems, from the perspective of his training in clinical psychology.
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- Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.
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