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Basic InformationMore InformationLatest NewsMost Young Americans Eager to Get COVID Vaccine: PollMany Kids Who Develop Severe COVID-Linked Syndrome Have Neurologic SymptomsMost Parents OK About School Rules for Kids' Return to Sports: PollSome Kids Snore, and It Could Affect BehaviorKids With Autism Can Really Benefit From ExerciseFDA Approves First New Children's ADHD Drug in 10 YearsWhy Are ER Wait Times Getting Longer for Kids in Mental Health Crisis?About 40,000 U.S. Children Have Lost a Parent to COVID-19Is Empathy Born in Mom's First Hugs?Adding in Stem Cell Therapy Helps Beat a Common Childhood LeukemiaWhat Will Summer Camp Look Like This Year?When Will America's Kids Get Their COVID Vaccines?1 in 4 Parents Won't Vaccinate Their Kids Against COVID-19: PollEven in a Pandemic, Child Vision Tests Are CrucialPfizer Says Its COVID Vaccine Is Very Effective in Kids as Young as 12Secondhand Smoke Is Sending Kids to the ERDrug Shows Promise Against Rare Condition That Stunts Kids' GrowthWhen Coal-Fired Power Plants Close, Kids With Asthma Breathe EasierAnother Study Finds COVID Doesn't Spread in Schools With Proper SafeguardsNearly Half of U.S. Schools Now Offer In-Person LearningLockdowns Gave Boost to Type 1 Diabetes Control in KidsWildfire Smoke Can Send Kids With Asthma to the ERPandemic Has Many Kids Struggling With Weight IssuesLab-Made Heart Valves Can Grow Along With Youngest Heart PatientsSome Kids With Type 1 Diabetes Face High Risk of Severe COVID-19Virtual Learning Has Taken a Toll on Kids' & Parents' Mental HealthCDC Says 3 Feet of Social Distancing Now OK in Most ClassroomsWhich Kids' Sports Have Higher Odds for Head Injury?Social Distancing Probably Stopped 2020 Outbreak of Paralyzing Disorder in KidsAHA News: What Parents Should Know About Rare But Scary COVID-19-Related IllnessSchool Dental Care Program Could Cut Cavities in Half: StudySocial Media, Binge Eating Often Go Together for KidsStressed and Distracted, Kids and Their Teachers Say Virtual Learning Isn't WorkingSports Position Doesn't Affect Risk of Concussion-Linked CTE IllnessPandemic Putting Added Strain on Parents of Kids With CancerDogs and Kids Are 'In Sync,' Study ShowsTeachers Main Drivers of School COVID Outbreaks, So Vaccinations Needed: StudyTips to Keep Young Athletes Injury-FreeMental Illness in Childhood Could Mean Worse Physical Health Decades LaterKids' Robust Immune Systems May Shield Them From COVID-19: StudyFertility Treatments Might Affect Kids' Growth, But Not for LongMom's Heart Health While Pregnant Could Influence Her Child's Health for YearsPandemic Has Affected Kids' Dental Health: PollNew Rabies Prevention Treatment Also Works in Kids: StudyWhen Will Kids Get the COVID Vaccines?U.S. Schools Can Reopen, With Safeguards in Place: CDCFetal Surgery Is Changing Lives for Kids With Spina BifidaKids Who Got Flu Shot Had Milder COVID Symptoms: StudyVery Little Spread of Coronavirus at Kids' Day Camps: StudyWhen Kids Misbehave, 'Verbal Reasoning' Can Sometimes Backfire Questions and AnswersLinks |
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Perfectionistic SonMy son has always been somewhat of a perfectionist. He always wants to play his best at sports and cries when he has a bad game. He has always had good grades and I have always told him that if he tries his best, that is the most important thing. The problem is that every time there is a big test in school (he is in the 7th grade), he studies, asks me to quiz him and if he gets an answer wrong he starts crying, he wakes up the next morning and goes straight for the text book and begins to cry as he studies again. He asks me to quiz him and again, if he misses something, he is in tears and says he doesn't know it and he is scared he's going to fail. He has always gotten mostly A's and some B's. I try to tell him that I understand that this test is important to him and I understand his fear that if he doesn't know it he could fail a test. I also try to ask him the question What's the worst that could happen? That he fails the test. Did he try his best? Did he feel satisfied with the amount of studying he did? Can he see himself with an F and still work hard in class and do better on the next test? I don't know what else to do? I explain to him that if he continues worrying so much that it puts him in tears every time he studies for test, gets quizzed for the test, he will make himself physically ill. I have had an ulcer and he knows what that was like and how painful. I tried to explain how important it is for him to stop, take a break, take a deep breath, go to sleep on time, study in the morning when he's had time away from the book. I need to know what else I can do because I don't want to increase his stress level, his fear and I can't handle seeing him cry every time there is a test. Help THE ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION WILL NOT BE DISPLAYED UNTIL YOU HAVE INDICATED YOUR AGREEMENT WITH THE DISCLAIMER PRINTED JUST BELOW. CLICK THE 'I AGREE' BUTTON TO AGREE TO THESE TERMS AND SEE THE RESPONSE.
- Dr. Dombeck responds to questions about psychotherapy and mental health problems, from the perspective of his training in clinical psychology.
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